Kerry’s “Top 10 Bush Tax Proposals”

So John Kerry appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman yesterday and joked (believe it or not!) about changes under President Bush’s tax plan.

His list went like this:

  1. No estate tax for families with at least two U.S. presidents.
  2. W-2 Form is now Dubya-2 Form.
  3. Under the simplified tax code, your refund check goes directly to Halliburton.
  4. The reduced earned income tax credit is so unfair, it just makes me want to tear out my lustrous, finely groomed hair.
  5. Attorney General (John) Ashcroft gets to write off the entire U.S. Constitution.
  6. Texas Rangers can take a business loss for trading Sammy Sosa.
  7. Eliminate all income taxes; just ask Teresa (Heinz Kerry) to cover the whole damn thing.
  8. Cheney can claim Bush as a dependent.
  9. Hundred-dollar penalty if you pronounce it “nuclear” instead of “nucular.”
  10. George W. Bush gets a deduction for mortgaging our entire future.

I’m betting someone wrote that for him 😛

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