While doing some random surfing, I came across a list of the top 5 illnesses that cause kids to miss school.
These illnesses are as follows:
1. The Common Cold
2. The Stomach Flu
3. Ear Infection
4. Pink Eye
5. Sore Throat
The main two that I personally got hit with as a kid, and that kept me from going to school sometimes, were the common cold and sore throat.
Until I ruined it for myself, that is…
The thing is that after a few times of falling sick and not having to go to school, I found that the best solution to not go to school on those days when I just didn’t feel like it was to act like I’m sick.
So I’d fake coughing, sneezing, having a sore throat, fevers and whatever was necessary to get me out of going to school, and it worked like a charm. It was almost the perfect crime.
But the problem is that once my father left, and school had already started, I’d be up and about, perfectly healthy, jumping around, running, playing and having the time of my life.
Needless to say, everyone noticed that, it’s hard to stay discrete with all your fun and games at that age, so after a number of times of me doing it, and then getting myself caught in the act, a decision was taken…
The decision more or less went as follows: No matter how ill you are, you’re going to school. Even if you’re dying, you go to school and then come back home and die.
Of course, I’m exaggerating a bit, and of course I did get to stay at home when I was really sick, but my acting days were mainly over and I had to cope with going to school everyday whether I felt like it or not, well at least most of the times.
Your fellow actor, MMM, my youngest daughter, when in elementary school, became quite adept at malingering. The most memorable of her performances was when she was ten, developing a sudden frighteningly high fever (holding the thermometer up to a light bulb) and trembling in the right arm. (A combination of superb acting and engendering muscle fatigue by holding a heavy floor lamp a few inches off the floor for a time, the lamp being beside the couch upon which she’d collapsed in her agony.)
Rushed her off to the hospital. After the usual several hours wait, we got to see one of the better children’s neurologists in Boston. She examined the child, asked her a few questions, then looked her in the eye and said, “Ok, Shelly. Knock off the crap and go to school.” Which she did.
That was the funny part. Now the dark part: her behavior became increasingly avoidant, a formerly bubbly, happy kid grew ever more sullen, angry, virtually mute. Took her to a woman at Harvard who must sure be one of the world’s better children’s psychiatrists. “She probably saw another child being abused by a staff member, probably in after-school care. I don’t think she herself was abused, or we’d be seeing far more bizarre behaviors. The staff member probably threatened the life of her mother if she talked. Get her out of there.”
All private schools were full–it was mid-year. So, I took her down to the U.S. Virgin Islands, put her into a lovely private school with nice people and iguanas ambling about the campus. She slowly made friends, joined the steel band and had a delightful year. And a year was all we could afford, but it worked. She’s now in college and has become something of a social butterfly–wants to major in abnormal psychology, get a law degree and be a public prosecutor, preferably going after child molesters.
There’s an old Irish proverb, translated from the Gaelic: “Fear the anger of a patient man.”
great list but you missed one which happends to a lot if not everyone during school days – Chicken pox – i had it last year at 17 it hurts
lol